|
|
02 Feb 2007, 1:38 pm / Other
See more at www.whynatte.com! Whynatte is going to take a moment here to give a special thank you to the New York Central Park Rangers White(www.centralparkrangers.com). The Rangers are a women's club soccer team in NYC, and probably the most rock solid collection of female soccer players in the nation. You think that you're getting a great workout while you read Cosmo on the elliptical? Think again, because these girls run a 10k like you put on glittered lip gloss before a blind date with someone you met on match.com. You think that you broke a great sweat speedwalking around the subdivision today?? Think again, these girls broke the tibia of an opposing player, broke up with their boyfriends without shedding a tear, and then broke your heart without even giving you the time of day. Basically, don't screw with the Rangers, or you'll wind up wearing your fat tongue like a half windsor knot around your fat neck. So, from this point forward, Whynatte is proud to be the official beverage of the NY Central Park Rangers. Special thanks to Kate, Lynsey, Pat/"Toey", Jaclyn, Walsh, Ryan, Ali, Jo, and friends Andrew, Ryan and Laura. Whynatte is proud to have you as our official club soccer team, and we are proud to be your team's official beverage. Kate accompanied the following pictures with the detailed timeline below: 10pm: arrived at the bar, with at least 5 willing whynatte virgins
10:02pm: asked bartender if they have access to a latte machine or a coffeemaker. negative to both
10:03pm: asked my friend jo if there was a starbucks nearby. negative
10:04pm: asked jo if there was a deli that served coffee nearby- 1st obstacle overcome
10:10pm: left ghettoass corner deli with a bag full of heavily creamed coffees. priced out at $4.50 10:15pm: asked my table (party of 10) if they'd be interested in trying a whynatte. affirmative responses from all, a couple of the quicker studies responded by saying "whynatte"?
10:16pm: asked a different bartender if i could have 10 pint glasses and 10 shots of jager for a new drink we were trying out at our table. she seemed fascinated, while the man next to me looked at me like i had 6 heads, but clearly emanating that sense of underlying jealousy that he had notte been invited to try one himself.
10:17pm: bartender informs me that the shotglasses at the bar are too large to fit into the pint glasses, and therefore, we cannot have whynattes
10:18pm: undetered, with coffee steadily growing colder at my table, i looked at her as if to say- is there any possible way to drink this drink?!
10:19pm: a bright one she is, that redheaded bartender, jessica. she suggests that we put the jager in the pint glasses and then add the coffee.
10:20pm: i realize this option is the only way to have a whynatte tonight. i also realize that we are getting increasingly further away from a true "whynatte" what with the deli coffee, the wrong size shot glasses and the jager first, followed by the coffee. at this point i realize what we are actually doing is tasting a "reverse whynatte" but as the motto goes, 'it is always better to have a whynatte than to not have one'
10:22pm: jager shots are poured. "toey" and lynsey come over to help carry these glasses of soon-to-be deliciousness to the table, where the perfect temp coffee is poured on top
10:23pm: the whynatte is enjoyed by all at the table, and photos are taken to commemorate the experience So now, I'll let the pictures do the talking: Jessica, the bartender. Nice nipple. 
The last supper? Nope, the first whynatte.
 The guy in green told his girlfriend that he was going out with "a few guys" tonight. What he really meant was that he was going to "have an enormous orgy with an entire girls soccer team".? Well pllayed.
 Can you say "wife material"?
 Lynsey: One more good reason to always keep a 4 carat princess cut ring in the glove box.
 Ryan: The kind of girl that can pound a whynatte, not get a drop of it on her crisp white shirt, and then cold cock you over the head with the glass, all before you have even mustered up the energy to ask her for her email address.
 Shannon, Lynsey, and Kate. Kate is obviously sober.
 Does the whynatte make you a funnier person?? Yes, see photo below.
|
